Thursday, June 9, 2011


Last night I went out to a "girl's night" to one of those over-priced jewelry parties with my neighbor. Since it was a rather extended drive to the party, we carpooled with a lady from her church. All three of us were fairly new moms--Me with a 5-month-old, neighbor with a 7-month-old, and her friend had an 8-month-old. For each of us, it was one of the first times we had been out without our babies in quite a long time. Of course, true to any car filled with mothers, we talked about nothing but our babies the whole time.

As we were driving, the friend mentioned she had moved over to formula because here supply dried up when her daughter was about 3-months-old. I thought, "how unfortunate! I absolutely adore nursing my little guy." But, she didn't seem to mind. It seemed as if she liked formula feeding more. Now, mind that I don't know this woman at all so there could certainly be a deeper story of which I'm just unaware.

As we got talking, she mentioned that she used the Babywise program. For any of you who know me, you know I'm not the biggest fan but to each her own. However, I did begin to wonder if this didn't affect her ability to produce milk. This isn't the case with all Babywise moms, but in my research, early weaning is quite common. As this mom had experienced, their milk supply slowly declines because they did not allow needed cluster feeds, and eventually, they are no longer able to breastfeed.

But, this is not a post about Babywise. This post is about priorities. As we continued driving, I discovered that this woman was quite interested in nutrition. She told us her theories about not introducing sugar to her children. Though she doesn't have any dogs, she told my neighbor (who has two dogs) about he research into raw versus commercial dog food and how it's so much better for the dogs.

Now, I don't know this woman's life and I'm not in a position to question her decisions, but from her casual attitude regarding breastfeeding, I wondered if she had done any research into the benefits of breast milk over formula, how to boost her supply, or simply, considered why it had declined in the first place. Obviously she cared a lot about nutritional choices so, why didn't the switch to formula seem to bother her at all?

As I arrived home, I discovered that Hyrum had been screaming for hours and had only gone down a few minutes before I arrived home. Honestly, it didn't really surprise me. He had taken awful naps all day. Being overtired in conjunction with the absence of mommy in his nighttime routine must have really thrown him off. At first I felt guilty for leaving but realized that I really do need time out as well. However, I could have done more during the day. During the day, I kept having this nagging feeling that I really should be sure he got a good nap, even if it meant that I had to sacrifice some cleaning time to lie down with him. But, I really wanted to get a few specific things done and in consequence, sacrificed my son's naps. I knew better. I knew that getting my son overtired in conjunction with a change was going to cause problems. Poor Brennan was the one who had to pay for my inconsideration that evening.

At the end of all of this, I was left considering priorities. How frequently do we make a decision in the moment that is convenient, even when we know deep down that it will have more lasting negative consequences? I try not to, but I know I certainly sacrifice the most important for lesser important things sometimes. Hopefully I'll think more carefully about my decisions in the future.


  1. that woman you talked about i am sad to say i am following in her footsteps no matter how much water i drink or the pills i take or the prescriptions i take i just don't have enough so its like i am tryin to stop but i am not so if she is like me which it doesnt sound like it, she could have no choice austin is 2 months and i have never yet since he was born be able to make him satisfied with just me and have him gain instead of loss lbs. and i know that if i stop i would feel depressed about not being able to nurse.

  2. Ashley: I know that some women truly are unable to nurse. That's why I acknowledge that I don't know her whole story. From what I could gather this wasn't one of those situations where she couldn't nurse but where it was just more convenient for her to switch to formula. I hope I didn't come across as a breast feeding Nazi. I do know a number of women who for a myriad of reasons (low supply, baby wouldn't tolerate their breast milk, severe reflux, etc.), was unable to breastfeed. Best of luck to you! I know your little Austin is well-loved and you are doing everything you can for him. Good luck and I'm so proud of you for continuing to do everything you can.