As many of you can probably tell, I get a little passionate from time to time about a few issues. It's fine to be passionate, at least in my mind. But, sometimes I let my passion slide over into judgement. I don't really like that about myself. I've really been struggling for a few months now to find a way to still feel passionate about things that feel right or wrong to me without slipping into "that mom" that I don't want to be. After some prayer, some thinking, and some good conversations, I feel that I'm getting closer to where I want to be. But if I were to list the one single thing that has made the biggest difference it would be spending less time online.
I don't think there's anything inherently wrong with being online. I think a lot of good things come from the internet and I definitely still enjoy me some Facebook and blogging time. But I have found that spending less time reading other people's inflamed blog posts or status updates helps me to feel a little less inflamed. Perhaps reading about other people's passions (whether they align with mine or not) just throws flames on my smouldering embers. Or perhaps I just get to live in my own little world where I don't know what other people are doing as much, so I can live more comfortably without worrying that I'm being judged. Or, really, maybe just blogging less means that I don't structure arguments in my head as much. Whatever it is, I just feel a lot better about it.
Now, don't get me wrong, I still feel a lot of passion about things. Just today I commented on and concurred with a friend's anti-Babywise Facebook status with gusto. But instead of feeling a huge vindictive surge against everyone and anything that upholds said book, I tried to talk about my feelings regarding the ideas in said book without passing judgement on those who have chosen to follow it. I hope I was successful in my intentions.
In any case, I've really found that less internet = less judgemental = happier mom. What this probably means in practical terms for this blog is that I'll be posting less. But for now, that just feels like the right thing for me.
Whether it's internet, TV, or something else, do you find that you have things that affect your mood as a mom (or dad)?